Welcome to Boxer & Rice

As the spinning wheels were slowly consumed by the giant stake, our three Good Fairies-men were devising a plan alone in the castle, while abundantly drinking beer.

“Silly fiddle faddle!” commented Krillin as he watched stake from the castle’s window.

“Now, come have a nice bottle of beer, dear. I’m sure it’ll work out somehow.” suggested a very tipsy Roshi.

“You’re bombed out of your mind if you really think a bonfire will stop Malefi-Cell.” bitterly stated Piccolo.

“Of course a bonfire won’t stop him. But what will?” Krillin asked just before sipping his eighteenth bottle of beer.

“Well, perhaps if we reason with him.” suggested Roshi while unsuccessfully trying to grab another bottle of beer.

“Reason?…..With Malefi-Cell ? Are you nuts ? ” answered Krillin and Piccolo in chorus.

“Well, he can’t be all bad….” added Roshi, vainly trying to convince himself.

“Oh, yes, he can!” vigorously asserted Krillin.

“I’d like to turn him into a fat ole hop toad!” Piccolo complained.

“Now, dear, that isn’t a very nice thing to say.” chided Roshi with a very pronounced lecturing tone

“Besides, we can’t. You know our magic doesn’t work that way.” logically pointed Krillin

“It can only do good, Piccolo-kun, to bring joy and happiness.” added Roshi wanting to lecture some more the fiery and sanguine yet good hearted fairy-man.

“Well, that would make me happy” groused Piccolo, then noticing the familiar nickname “and by the way DON’T CALL ME PICCOLO-KUN !!!”

“But there must be some way …” persisted Krillin refusing to be defeated once more by Malefi-Cell. Suddenly, hit by a bright idea he exclaimed ” There he is! Off course… Yes there he is…”.

“There he is what????” questioned Piccolo

“What is it, Krillin? ” overbid Roshi.

“I’m going to …” started to explain Krillin, then realizing something “shh, shh, shh! Even walls have ears.” Krillin sneaked cautiously around every corner of the room then mysteriously he whispered “Follow me!”.

Krillin used his magic to chibified himself then he flew into the insides of Prince Gohan’s present that rest on the table and appeared to be a richly sculpted ebony musical box able to play both “We Gotta Power” and “Cha la Head Cha la”. Piccolo and Roshi immediately followed him though Piccolo was reluctant to chibify himself and muttered something about avenging himself of stupid fanfic authors.

Inside the musical box, Krillin used his magic to securely close the lid, then he explained his plan: ” I’ll turn him into an hop’s field!”

“Malefi-Cell?” asked a puzzled Piccolo.

“Oh no, don’t be stupid Piccolo-chan, I’m talking of Prince Aurora ! Brilliant isn’t it ?” bragged Krillin.

“Oh brilliant indeed, I’m sure he’d make tasty beers.” commented a thrilled Roshi.

Piccolo and Krillin sighed with exasperation at the stupid remark of their stoned comrade.

“Don’t you see, an hop’s field can’t prick its finger.” explained Krillin

“It hasn’t any.” added Piccolo, unsure of Roshi’s logical abilities in such state.

“Oh !!! That’s right.” replied Roshi as he finally understood Krillin’s stratagem

“This way, Prince Aurora will be perfectly safe” stated Krillin proud of him.

“Until Malefi-Cell sends a frost” Piccolo pointed after realizing the weak spot of their strategy.

“Yes, a … oh dear!” let loose a devastated Krillin.

“He always ruins our best hops fields because he hates beer.” bitterly stated Roshi while sipping another beer.

“You’re right. And he’ll be expecting us to do something like that.” summed up Krillin.

“But what won’t he expect, he knows everything” blurted an irritated Piccolo.

“Oh but he doesn’t Piccolo-kun” asserted Roshi. “Malefi-Cell doesn’t know anything about love, or kindness, or the joy of helping earnest. You know, sometimes I don’t think he’s really very happy.” finished a saddened Roshi.

Krillin getting excited: “That’s it, of course! It’s the only thing he can’t understand, and won’t expect.” Then speaking to himself :”oh, oh, now, now … We have to plan it carefully, let’s see, woodcutters cottage, yes, yes, the abandoned one, of course King Vegeta will object, but when we explain it’s the only way …”

“Explain what?” questioned Piccolo who disliked being excluded from an important discussion.

Krillin noticing the two other fairies-men : “About the three woodcutters raising a foundling child deep in the forest.”

“Oh, that’s very nice of them.” observed Roshi not fully understanding Krillin’s plan.

“And where are you going to find such stupid mortals ? ” Piccolo haughtily blurted out.

Krillin joyously answered : Turn around!

While Piccolo and Roshi turned around to face a mirror, Krillin changed their outfit to woodcutters

“iih … why, it’s … us!” was all that Roshi managed to say being under the heavy influence of several pints of beer.

“You mean, we, us? Have you lost your mind ????” exclaimed a dumbfounded Piccolo

Finally understanding the plan, Roshi asked “Take care of the baby?”

“Why not?” answered Krillin

“Oh, I’d like that! I always wanted to be dad !!!” stated Roshi with euphoria.

Piccolo noticing that his suit is red immediately changed its color to mauve, then analyzing the plan he asked “Well, yes, yes that could work, but will we have to feed it?”

“And wash it and dress it and rock it to sleep. Oh I’d love it. ” overbid Roshi

“You can’t seriously think we can !!!!” questioned a very concerned Piccolo.

Krillin firmly asserted :”If humans can do it, so can we.”

“Well it’s true that we have our magic to help us.” admitted an half defeated Piccolo.

“That’s right” outbid a very confident Roshi

Krillin frowning : “Oh, no, no, no, no, no magic! I’ll take those wands right now. Oh, better get rid of those wings, too.”

Piccolo in a very scared tone : “You mean, live like mortals? For SIXTEEN YEARS ????” and as Krillin removed his wings Piccolo added “No way, we don’t know how. Please Krillin honey, come back to your senses. We’ve never done anything without magic.”.

“And that’s why Malefi-Cell will never suspect.” said Krillin with a satisfied tone perfectly knowing now that Piccolo will surrender to his arguments.

“But who’ll wash, and cook?” vainly tried an already defeated Piccolo.

“Oh, we’ll all pitch in.” encouraged a very confident Krillin.

“I’ll take care of the baby!” declared a very pleased Roshi.

“Let me have it, dear” suggested Krillin still hunting for Piccolo’s wand. “Come along now, We must tell their majesties at once”.

Krillin immediately changed himself to normal size, but first forgets about Roshi and Piccolo, while running towards King Vegeta’s room

Roshi: Krillin!

Piccolo: Krillin come back here right now or I’ll kill you slowly and VERY painfully, I don’t want anyone to see me like this!

Krillin sweat dropped at Piccolo’s threat so he’ll immediately blows up Piccolo and Roshi. Then they left the room.

Outside the castle. We see Vegeta and Goku at a balcony looking down towards the three Good Fairies-men carrying the baby away.

The three Good Fairies-men left without warning that night. Krillin carried the young Trunks (formerly Prince Aurora) while the others made way with the rest of their plan. Now disguised as woodcutters, they fled the kingdom and settled down in the small cottage in the glen. King Vegeta watched with heavy heart as his most precious possession, his only child, disappeared into the night….

Many sad and lonely years passed by for King Vegeta and his people. But as the time for the prince’s sixteenth birthday drew near, the entire kingdom began to rejoice. For everyone knew that as long as Malefi-Cell’s domain, the forbidden mountains, thundered with his wrath and frustration, his evil prophecy had not yet been fulfilled.

Inside Malefi-Cell’s fearsome castle a huge patrol composed of thousand of blue mini-Cell are reporting on their activities. Malefi-Cell is now talking to his search patrol.

“It’s incredible, sixteen years and not a trace of him! He couldn’t have vanished into thin air. Are you sure you searched everywhere?” asked a very irritated Malefi-Cell.

“Yeah, yeah, anywhere, we all …” replied the first mini-Cell who’s appearing to be the patrol leader.

“Yeah, yeah!” outbid the second mini-Cell.

“But what about the town, the forests, the mountains?” suggested a more and more edgy and pissed Malefi-Cell (which wasn’t a good thing knowing that he was very powerful and as quick-tempered as malevolent).

“We searched mountains, forests, and houses, and let me see, in all the cradles.” proudly itemized the first mini-Cell.

“Cradle? ” asked a very surprised Malefi-Cell.

“Yeah, yeah, every cradle.” confirmed a very confident second mini-Cell

“Cradle ?” suddenly burst a very angry Malefi-Cell. Then trying to calm himself he confided to his pet raven “Did you hear that my pet? All these years, they’ve been looking for a baby!” and he started to laugh “oh, oh, ha, ha, ha …”

The mini-Cells being really stupid joined laughter : “ha, ha, ha …”

Noticing that, Malefi-Cell abruptly stopped laughing and in a deadly tone screamed “Fools! Idiots! Imbeciles!” while blasting most of them with powerful green lightning.

Once he finished to drive his search patrol away, he decided to more calmly discuss of the situation with his raven : “Oh, they’re hopeless. A disgrace to the forces of evil. My pet, you are my last hope. Circle far and wide, search for a farm hand of sixteen years with hair color of the purest amethyst, a pretty face and a sharp spirit. Go, and do not fail me.” threatened Malefi-Cell as his pet raven flew away….