The Saiyan Code
by FireCracker7     More by this Writer

1. Bones are good but blood is better.

2. Fight about everything, anything, and nothing.

3. Sometimes fighting is better than sex, but not often.

4. If an alien calls you monkey, turn oozaru and stomp his ass.

5. Have sex when you're angry.

6. A good meal is messy.

7. Never choose between food and sex. Do both.

8. A chibi knows its own.

9. Lock your mate inside during rut season.

10. By law you can howl at the moon.

11. If someone insults your mate, burn their house down.

12. Never leave furballs without permission.

13. Scratching your ass is bliss.

14. Sex is best after a fight.

15. Always ask "May I?" before attacking someone.

16. Crash parties.

17. Have friendly wars.

18. After you kill an enemy, roast his head on a stick.

19. Riot during weddings.

20. If your mate is homely, screw in the dark.

21. If your mate is fine, screw in the streets.

22. If a woman kisses your tail, she wants to have your chibi.

23. When a man comes to your door naked, he wants to screw BEFORE
dinner and a movie.

24. If you catch your mate cheating, hold the in-laws hostage.

25. A stab in the hand is worth two in the ribs.

26. Always get a good morning kiss...on the ass.

27. Never go oozaru on the first date.

28. Train your brats at bar fights.

29. When oozaru, be certain to step on someone you know.

30. Violence solves everything.

31. When possible, marry a cook.

32. Always work for food.

33. If your mate smells like soap, he/she is cheating.

34. If your mate just smells, he/she is faithful.

35. If your mate cheats, go out and have an affair yourself.

36. If both you and your mate cheat, get the lovers and have an orgy.

37. Take your chibi to a card game for luck.

38. If someone tells you to 'go climb a tree' just do it.

39. Always try for it when your mate's asleep.

40. Comb out old shed before going on a date.

41. Always kiss and howl.

42. If your neighbor complains about noise during rut season, go do
it in his backyard.

43. When a chibi comes to you, it's because you're blood.

44. If someone you don't remember has a chibi that comes to you,
you're in deep shit.

45. Kisses and sex should be sloppy.

46. Stink is good during rut season.

47. Trust no alien.

48. If a man's cock curls he has a disease.

49. A good drink is like a good mate; wet and easy to go down.

50. A tight fit makes for a long marriage.

51. Howl in the dark and a chibi will cry in the dawn.

52. Never stay angry at your mate; you'll need sex later.

53. Be romantic when you hump.

54. When doing buisness, hide the knife in your hand.

55. Leave a mark, but no trail.

56. Take no prisoners.

57. Leave no evidence.

58. A good bone makes seasoning.

59. Eat your enemy but mount the head.

60. Love made best is love made loud.


THE END

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