Vegeta walked by the gathering that sat on the grass in a circle and made a face. That Bulma woman was being stupid again.
"Come on, guys! What, are you chicken!?"
Yamcha just laughed at her. "You just want to get off on seeing two guys kiss."
Piccolo sat next to Bulma, legs crossed, looking annoyed, a sweat drop hanging off the side of his head.
"It's simple, if you land on Piccolo, you don't have to kiss anyone. He's your 'get out of jail free card.'"
Bulma laughed at the expression on all of their faces. Krillen was beet-red, Goku looked perplexed, Yamcha looked disturbingly interested, and Tien darted his three eyes at the others nervously.
Tien implored, "You can't be serious! You guys aren't really going to do this, are you?"
"And why shouldn't they?! It's about time we play a game that I select. I've been a real good sport and now it's your turn." Bulma crossed her arms, staring down the three-eyed man.
Krillen, hesitantly, "But Bulma, come on ..."
"NO, Krillen. I've played every stupid game you guys have suggested, always way out of my league against all of you and I never complained. I've done relay races, tag, tennis, sack potato races, hide-n-seek, football, soccer, baseball, curling, ice-hockey, diving, the bi-athalon, pool, cricket, rugby, polo, Frisbee, skeet shooting, and I NEVER WIN. NO! Today it's my turn to pick a game and I'm picking one I CAN'T LOSE!"
Goku scratched his head. "I guess that's fair, guys. But I don't understand the point."
Bulma sighed heavily. "Fine, I'll go over it one more time. It's simple. The one who remains in the game the longest wins. When you spin the bottle and land on someone, you have to kiss that person. And I'm talking a real kiss, a French kiss – I want to see some tongue! One minute in length -- Piccolo will be our time keeper. Then that person spins next. The only other rules are, if you land on Piccolo, you don't have to kiss anyone and he spins the next spin. If you land on me, you kiss me and you lose -- you're out of the game. When I spin and hit you, you stay in the game and you get to kiss one gorgeous woman. I automatically don't lose – squeal! – and I get to kiss some babes while I'm at it." And with that, Bulma winked, laughing mischievously.
Vegeta, leaning on a nearby tree with his arms folded, grunted in disgust.
Bulma rolled her eyes at him and continued, "So, Piccolo, would you do the honors?" Bulma indicated the bottle on the ground in the center of the circle they formed.
Piccolo, looking as if he were about to touch molten lava, reached down and spun the bottle. All the men stared at the bottle in trepidation as it spun. Bulma bit her lip in anticipation. The bottle's spin slowed and eventually... landed on...
Goku.
"Does that mean I kiss Piccolo now?"
Piccolo screamed, "NO YOU DON"T!"
"ARRRGH, Goku, don't you listen?! No. No one kisses Piccolo. Piccolo just did the first spin. Now you go!"
Goku grinned sheepishly.
Vegeta grunted, "Idiot."
"No comments from the peanut gallery, Vegeta. Unless you play, you have nothing to say!" Bulma shot Vegeta a stern look. He only scoffed and turned his head away.
"All right, here goes!" Goku leaned in and spun the bottle. It landed... on...
Piccolo.
Everyone groaned. Vegeta looked on, a hint of annoyance on his face.
Sighing, Bulma said, "No, that's good." In a derisive mutter to herself, "For Goku." She continued to the rest, "Because he gets to stay in the game longer."
Back to the game, "Ok Piccolo, do the honors again."
Piccolo spun the bottle.
The bottle... landed on...
Krillen.
Krillen turned white with fear and made a clicking noise in his throat.
"Come on, Krillen. Spin!"
"All right, all right, Bulma. Man! She's bossy." Krillen spun the bottle and closed his eyes.
The bottle... landed on...
Bulma.
Yamcha laughed out loud. "You dog!"
Krillen opened his eyes. "Whoa! Wait, I'm out." Then, Krillen realizing the significance of it, "I'M OUT! YEAH!"
Krillen looked truly happy for the first time since the game began. And then he realized what else he had to do and his face turned a rosy shade.
"Come here, Lover!" Bulma laughed, practically cracking up. She shrugged. Krillen wasn't her thing, but it was worth kissing him just to get this bunch to play the game.
Krillen sheepishly made his way over to Bulma and sat on the grass next to her. He started to giggle uncontrollably and she rolled her eyes at him. "Krillen, it's just a kiss." She sighed heavily, "All right!" And with that, Bulma wrapped her hands around the bald man's bald head and pulled him close.
Piccolo grunted.
Everyone around them blushed.
Vegeta made a retching noise.
"Time!" Piccolo yelled, wanting the wet kissing noises to end.
Bulma broke the kiss and Krillen fell out of her arms to the grass, a stunned look on his face. He said a few incoherent things and just dreamily looked up at the sky.
"Ok, it's my turn! Woohoo!" Bulma grabbed the bottle and gave it a spin.
The bottle... landed on...
Yamcha.
"All right!" Yamcha pumped a triumphant fist in the air and smirked. "Come on over here, Babe!"
Bulma gave Yamcha a flirtatious glance, "You better make it last, because this is about all you're getting for a long time." She winked at him as she walked over.
"Oh, this is disgusting!" Vegeta blurted.
Bulma shot Vegeta a look of exasperation, then smiled, mischievously. With a pointed look she glanced from Vegeta to Yamcha, and gave Yamcha the kiss of his life. Yamcha moaned towards the end of it and Bulma knew that Vegeta had to have heard. Inwardly, she said, "Yes!"
"Time!" Piccolo's face was turning a pink shade, his coloring becoming reminiscent of a geranium.
Bulma returned to her spot and said, "Ok, Yamcha, it's your turn. Spin!"
Yamcha, still grinning at Bulma lasciviously, spun the bottle, and landed... on...
Tien.
Tien gasped, all three eyes popping open widely. He looked at Yamcha next to him in fear.
Yamcha just laughed. "Hey man, don't sweat it." And before Tien could even think any of this through, Yamcha grabbed him by his head and kissed him. Tien shut his eyes tightly, except for his third eye which circled lazily.
"Time!" And with that, Yamcha broke the kiss. Tien was a bright beet-red color when he reached, with a trembling hand and spun the bottle.
The bottle landed on Piccolo and Tien sighed heavily in relief.
Piccolo spun the bottle and it landed on Goku. Goku laughed out loud, scratching the back of his head. Goku reached for the bottle and spun it.
It landed on Piccolo.
Vegeta groaned out loud.
The next round of spins went like this: Piccolo, Yamcha, Bulma and Yamcha was out of the game. Yamcha finished his kiss and looked at Vegeta with a satisfied grin on his face.
Choosing to stick it to Vegeta, Yamcha joyously exclaimed, "I like this game!"
Vegeta retorted, "You would!"
Bulma spun and landed on Goku.
"Wow, I hit the motherload!" she squealed.
Bulma shot a look at Vegeta and was pleased to see his cheeks turning pink, his hands forming tight fists.
Bulma hopped up and grabbed a giggling Goku. She gave him a long, lingering kiss.
"Time!"
Bulma broke the kiss dreamily and just stared at Goku for a second. "Wow Goku. ChiChi's really lucky."
Goku just grinned sheepishly. "Thank you!"
Vegeta made a gurgling, gagging noise.
"Ok, Goku, it's your turn."
Goku landed... on... Piccolo.
"HE'S CHEATING!" Vegeta yelled.
Bulma, an annoyed look on her face, eyes partially closed in disgust, regarded him as she would a bug. "He is not cheating, Vegeta. And just why are you even here?!"
Vegeta just grunted loudly in response.
"Gee Vegeta, I'm just spinning. You can give it a try if you want," Goku chirped.
Vegeta just grunted and turned his head away again.
Piccolo spun the bottle and it landed on Goku again. Goku giggled and took another spin.
Again it landed on Piccolo.
"THAT'S IT!!"
Vegeta came over in a shot and tossed himself on the ground next to Bulma. He grabbed the bottle but Bulma protested that it was Piccolo's turn to spin. Vegeta grunted as he let the bottle go, staring down Goku who only looked back at him perplexed.
"I'm going to win this game, Kakarot. And I'll have the satisfaction of beating you!"
Bulma watched the heated exchange and inwardly grinned, thinking, "Yes, he's playing!"
Forcing composure, Bulma demanded, "All right, Piccolo. Spin!"
The bottle... landed on...
Tien, who again looked as if he wanted to crawl under the very earth he sat upon. Tien spun and the bottle landed on Bulma. Shyly, he took his kiss and was out of the game.
"Aww, what a nice kiss, Tien," Bulma purred at a blushing Tien as he went over to sit next to Yamcha and Krillen. The three sat cross-legged on the grass, munching on gummi frogs as they watched the rest of the game.
"OH LET'S GET ON WITH IT!" Vegeta screamed.
"Hold your horses!" Bulma yelled back. She spun the bottle and it landed on Piccolo.
Yamcha called out, "Man, if Piccolo had to kiss everyone..." but was silenced immediately by the look that Piccolo shot him.
Piccolo spun the bottle and it... landed on...
Vegeta.
"Hah!" Vegeta held a fist in Goku's direction, an evil look on his face, "Now you'll see what winning really means!" He laughed mirthlessly as he spun the bottle.
It landed on Piccolo.
Bulma cursed inwardly, Damn!
Piccolo spun and it landed on Goku.
Goku giggled and spun.
It landed on Piccolo.
"ARRRMMGH, I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!"
"Vegeta, just calm down!" Bulma yelled at the Saiyan Prince. Vegeta ignored her, staring at the bottle as Piccolo reached for it, the look on his face making it seem like the fate of the universe rested on that next spin.
Piccolo spun the bottle and it landed on Vegeta.
Vegeta, grinning at Goku, spun the bottle and it landed on Piccolo.
Piccolo, Goku, Piccolo, Goku, Piccolo, Vegeta, Piccolo, Goku, Piccolo, Vegeta, Piccolo, Vegeta, Piccolo, Vegeta... and on and on it went, both Saiyans staring each other down as they spun the bottle, time and time again, each time having it land on Piccolo.
In the midst of all of this, one spin landed on Bulma and she eagerly reached for the bottle to give it a spin. It landed on Piccolo and she threw up her hands in disgust.
Finally, the blue haired woman couldn't take it any longer.
As Vegeta reached for the bottle, Bulma screamed in his ear, "OH COME ON ALREADY!"
Vegeta, surprised, jumped and his spin skewed, "YOU'VE DISTRACTED ME!!!!"
Everyone watched as the bottle spun once, twice, thrice and slowed, heading towards Bulma, who inwardly cheered, then went past her, to land on...
Goku.
Vegeta made a strangled noise in his throat as he stared at Goku, white faced.
Goku giggled.
Vegeta roared at the injustice of it all. He reached for the bottle as he yelled, "DO OVER!"
"NO! NO do over! You touch that bottle, Vegeta, and you forfeit!"
"I what..."
Goku turned to Bulma, scratching his head, "Does that mean I win, if he forfeits?"
"Yes, it does," she said sweetly, looking at Vegeta with a satisfied smirk. She knew that would keep Vegeta in the game and she planned another well-timed scream for his next spin and maybe this time he would land on her. But in the meantime, she'd enjoy seeing these two gorgeous men go at it. She grinned at the pair of them like a cat with a saucer of cream.
Vegeta growled, his hand forming a fist as he stared at Goku in impotent rage. His growl turned into a roar. Goku scratched his head nervously as he looked back at the Saiyan Prince. Goku darted a look at Bulma helplessly.
Bulma shrugged at him.
Vegeta, letting the words rip from his throat in defeat said, "OH ALL RIGHT!"
Vegeta grabbed Goku by his shirt, dragging him over to plant his lips on the larger Saiyan's mouth.
Everyone blinked.
The kiss was angry at first, just their mouths pressed together.
Bulma, teasingly reminded, "Nah ah AHH, I don't see tongue!"
Vegeta made a growling noise and opened his mouth over Goku's, a visible glimpse of his tongue sliding over Goku's tongue outside their mouths. He turned his head and continued to entwine his tongue around Goku's.
Everyone stared at the pair, open-mouthed.
Vegeta moved his head, and breathed a ragged sound that seemed sensual as his tongue disappeared in Goku's mouth. Goku's eyes fluttered open briefly and everyone saw as the larger Saiyan's eyes spun and twirled up into his head before they closed once more. Their hands started to move up and down each other's bodies as groans escaped from their lips.
They pressed closer together.
Vegeta moved his head continuously now, moaning, as he pressed into Goku in urgency. Goku visibly trembled and whimpered.
"Time!"
The pair of Saiyans didn't seem to hear and everyone blinked in surprise, rendered speechless. Vegeta, breathing raggedly through his nose, whimpered and gasped as he elicited pained noises escaping from Goku's lips. Goku's moans built until they reached a full fledged trembling groan.
"TIME!" Piccolo screamed.
Still, the Saiyans didn't hear. They continued to twine their bodies together, their kisses changing into hungry, snarling bites.
Bulma heard herself, as if from far away, say, "Holy crap!"
Vegeta buried his tongue once more inside Goku's mouth.
"TIME! TIME!" Piccolo screamed once more.
Vegeta deepened the kiss, causing Goku to whine loudly.
The bottle underneath them burst into a powder of fine glass dust from a sudden rise in Goku's ki.
"TIME!" Everyone screamed.
Vegeta pushed Goku away roughly, his lips swollen from the gnashing kiss. Goku fell to the ground on his back, a stunned look on his face, his lips also bruised and swollen.
Everyone listened to the pair's ragged breathing, not daring to make a sound themselves.
Vegeta stood up proudly over Goku. "Since Kakarot broke the bottle with his rise in ki, he forfeits. I win."
And with that, the Saiyan Prince proudly walked away, not bothering to look back or say a word to the stunned gathering.
As he left, Krillen leaned over to Yamcha and said, "You know, he really should wear underwear under that spandex. It's too revealing."
Yamcha, having seen the obvious and ample arousal on the Saiyan Prince replied, "Yeah! No kidding."
The End.