Chapter 02 : Amends
It...is difficult for me. I have never been one to apply caution to my words, my sarcasm. State things the way that they are and to hell with the consequences, that has been my way since the day I could form words. Besides that, I am--was--a prince. What did I care what those beneath me thought or felt?
So it is very trying--wearing on my nerves--thinking through every word that springs to mind before allowing them to actually pass over my lips.
But it is time for change. Every living creature survives by adapting to change, and for those such as I, whose lives dwarf those of these...earthlings, refusing to change is a deadly error.
And I cannot forget the future that I foresaw. I shiver. Was it a dream or a vision? Kami, let it only be a dream. Just remembering makes my hands tremble and I feel the irrational need to go to them, no matter where they are or what they are doing, just to look upon them. And him.
To make sure they are alive. To...touch him.
I still remember the ghost of him in my mind's hellish future, when he spoke those words to me, nervous and naive and afraid. I remember myself...
I feel ill. I try to forget everything, to ignore it completely, but I cannot. I still see your face as you lie there on the cold metal tiles, leaving me to face a loneliness so great the darkness of it pulled at my soul like a black hole.
I feel cold again and rub my hands over my arms, trying to warm myself.
My son is alive; that alone brings me a great joy. I watch him cut through the sky with your son, their movements graceful and swift, smiles on their faces as they defy gravity in their tumble. And then there is you.
I frown. It is still...awkward for me, these emotions. New, they are not; they have been brought to life after a deep slumber and they surprise me, even though they should not. I look at you as you lay in the grass, hands behind your head as you watch the mock-battle above us with a smile on your face. I...have always been fascinated by you. Your bravery, your warrior's spirit--your kindness...
Your beauty...
I blink, this description feeling alien in my mind's thoughts, but I cannot deny the truth in it. Every part of you is beautiful; large, dark eyes; long eyelashes and untamable hair. Your body is one of perfection. I have known this for years as well, having been your sparring partner countless times over. But now, I see everything differently--with a new light, you might say.
Yes, perfection--every line and curve of flesh adorning your bright soul glows with the word, and I feel the most undeniable urge to touch them, trace them over your figure with gentle caresses.
Suddenly, you glance my way, a questioning look on your face, and I turn away. I can feel my skin burning.
~~+~~
He watches me. He has always watched me, for some reason or another--hate, anger, jealously, respect, awe...but this time it feels different. He would like to think I don't know that he stares at me, but I do. I am not a fool.
I smile at his back, which he has quickly given me in response to my unspoken question. He has been acting strangely these past few weeks... He has been...gentle. If that word fits.
I can sense he feels my scrutiny, so I turn my gaze back to our sons. Yes, it fits. I close my eyes.
Ever since that morning that he smiled at me with an openness I have never seen in him, his verbal jabs have become less often and less in their intensity, reduced to playful taunts and dry sarcasm. He looks at us, at me, like he's seeing us for the first time.
I feel...warm...when he looks at me. It has been so many years and the world passes by, but we remain, our cells barely affected by the stroke of the clock. I never knew...but Vegita warned me long ago and I'm grateful. I'm not alone.
Once again, I sense his eyes on me, but I feign ignorance, keeping my eyes closed and simply basking in that...feeling I get when he is near, like a comforting presence for my spirit.
~~+~~
The day wears on and the more I stare at him, the more I realize that I... I want him.
As a friend, yes--he has given me that for more years than I have deserved. But...I also want him. Now that I have destroyed my denial, these emotions burn through my veins and grow stronger with each passing second. I am afraid.
And I burn for him...
The sky grows orange, the sun nearing the end of its journey, and our children break apart and wave before disappearing toward home--our home. Capsule Corporation is large and suits our purposes nicely. And there is no longer reason for us to be apart--we are the last of our kind.
He sits up, as if preparing to follow and I move to sit beside him, saying his name softly.
He looks over at me, surprised, I suppose, by both my tone and my proximity, but also curious. "N?"
"Kakarotto..." I frown, the difficulty in forming words frustrating me, but he is silent, patiently giving me time. "I feel...for you..." I manage to say, the burn returning to my skin.
He simply stares at me, eyes wide with astonishment and I begin to wonder whether this was a bad idea...
Then he smiles at me, a bright, joyful expression that radiates warmth and affection and I feel it wash over me, baptizing me.
"Vegita," he whispers, sending shivers across my skin. "I think...I do, too."
An excited flicker of movement draws my attention. His tail sways in happy jerks behind him and I smile, capturing the end of it gently in my grasp. He inhales sharply through his nose and I lean forward to rest my forehead against his, my eyes staring deeply into his own. "I burn for you," I whisper my confession against his lips.
It is adorable, that rosy color that spreads so easily across his features.
Slowly, I close the centimeters that separate us, brushing my lips against his own, waiting for his reaction. I purr when he leans against me, a soft moan parting his lips, allowing me to taste him for the first time. Sweet, like honey... I will become drunk off his taste and scent. Reluctantly, I break away; it is still too soon, but I take delight in seeing my own desire reflected in his eyes.
"Let's go home," I murmur, releasing his tail and offering my hand to help him stand. Kami, I love his smile...
Weeks have passed once again, and it is becoming harder and harder to ignore this burning, this need. How could I have not noticed this fire before? I am consumed with it now.
He looks at me from across the living room, his eyes dark and promising. Trunks and Goten...they are not stupid; they can sense the change between us, notice the gentle touches and silent glances. I was afraid at first, but my son merely smiled at me and winked, a mischievous gleam in his eyes... I am still not sure what that meant, but at least he knows. He sits there now, on the floor with Kakarotto's boy, playing some game, both pretending to ignore us.
I cannot stand it anymore--I get up and leave, deciding to retreat rather than feel the weight of his gaze. I am nearly at my door when he appears at my side...damn that technique.
I grab him by his shirt and with a growl, pull him into the room with me, shutting the door with my tail. He stands there, waiting, desire and uncertainty flickering across his features. I pull him down for a heated kiss, my tongue telling him exactly what I want to do with him and he moans, arms wrapping around me.
With a few powerful tugs, we are both free of all restrictions and I press him back against the bed. I want to worship him. I lean over him, pressing our heated bodies together and moving till my lips meet his parted ones again, taking away his gasp of pleasure that comes with the rocking of flesh against flesh.
He murmurs my name, a soft, husky whisper against my lips before I move to explore his body, my tongue tasting the heated flesh of his neck and chest.
Spice. That is his taste, I decide, as my teeth graze the peaks on his chest. He arches against me, his face flushed, and I know that I have never seen anything so beautiful. I damn that dream to hell as our lips meet again, our sweat-glistened bodies sliding against one another in a delightful rhythm.
He will never face rejection from me, I swear.
Our touches become even more fevered, the heat from our flesh demanding to be quenched. I greedily swallow his loud moan of pleasure as I stretch him gently, causing him to writhe beneath me.
My Carrot is impatient, but I will not be swayed. I enter him slowly, panting from the incredible heat that surrounds me. Kami, I burn!
He mews softly under me and I lean forward to devour his lips once again, his arms and legs clinging to me desperately. Slowly, I begin thrusting into his heat, savoring every incoherent cry and moan that he gives. The fever is building between us even more and I can feel the tremors that travel across his body. I spread him even more, changing the angle of my movements and he arches, head thrown back as a moan of sheer ecstasy is torn from his throat. His tail wraps around my leg tightly, possessively, and I move my own to stroke it, panting as the stimulation causes the hairs to fluff and ripple with sensation
on both our appendages.
Finally, we are there, the heat of our bodies burning like a furnace, turning white-hot with a pleasure so shattering it is almost painful. I scream his name, both his names, my muscles spasming and my vision going white as I explode, my body one with his. In the throes of our passion, I coil my tail around him, tugging only once before he joins me. Gasping, I watch as he bucks and quivers beneath me, screaming his joy through swollen lips.
Mine, I think I say aloud, and embrace him tightly, absently licking his salty flesh with reverence. I feel his arms move around me, his tail curling around my thigh again as he nuzzles into my neck.
"Vegita."
A whisper, a prayer, a declaration contained within one word and as one we can hear the syllable echoing in my mind, even as I send it to his.
Love.
I am not alone. I feel this more true than any other thing in my life as I sense our souls become one fire, my own spirit baptized and shared with the light of my mate's.
Fate is strange, whispering glimpses of mistakes in our mind's ear, allowing amends for deeds never committed, leaving only the ghosts of their memory.
We are together. He smiles at me. The future belongs to us.