Welcome to DBZ Saiyan Garden

► Guilty Pleasures     Paranoia     Glasses     Shadow     Boyfriend     Hot Spot     Spark     Spark     Power     Real Love     The Party     Stripped     Embrace     One Moment     The Silent Treatment     Understanding     Amalgam     Instinct     Fortitude     Single Today was May 27th, Age 775.

Today was the first anniversary of Gohan's suicide.

Gohan had recently turned 19 years old, and it was the first birthday he'd actively celebrated for a long time. He spent some extra time in bed that morning in quiet contemplation.

So much had changed in that time. He was still in that small allocated bedroom, which he had slowly made his own over the past few weeks. He went over the events that landed him there, in that room, on that day.

One year ago today, he died as a result of self inflicted wounds after a years long battle with depression, a battle he was still fighting every single day. He got himself sent to Hell in a fit of self loathing, petty vandalism and attempted assault on King Yemma's personnel. After three weeks in Hell, he was wished back against his own wishes, only to find that making said wish caused the barriers between Earth, Heaven and Hell to break down. Life and death no longer applied, and the dead and the living existed amongst one another.

Frieza had escaped Hell and reclaimed his empire, trapping Gohan, his family and friends for weeks on end, sedating and torturing them. Then came his six month long kidnapping at the hands of Cell and their lonely isolation. They reunited with his family and friends eventually in a disused warehouse outside of North City, a place where Frieza's men kept them as prisoners. The Ginyu Force had switched sides to join up with them and elected Jeice as their new captain. Jeice had remained his closest friend and confidant since they were in Hell together.

Once they escaped the warehouse, they ended up living on the Lookout for a while, the only place on earth where they wouldn't be detected. Gohan's new addiction to narcotics took a serious hold of him whilst they were there, almost killing him. But he survived and got himself clean. Frieza had then terraformed the planet to make it uninhabitable to humans, but not before the fighters robbed him of the four dragon balls in his possession.

And now he was here in the other world, in a large house on the Grand Kai's planet, created especially for them, complete with training grounds outside to help them prepare for the upcoming battle.

But throughout all of these events of the past 12 months was one massive factor which he'd tried not to think about much lately – his affair with Cell; that scandalous, abusive, immoral and, at times, indecent relationship they'd found themselves in over time.

Then another realisation hit him – he'd been sleeping with the android on and off for a year.

That first time Gohan kissed him in a violent fit of emotion felt like a lifetime ago. Cell was a huge part of him; for starters, he was his first and only sexual partner, but he also contributed to many of Gohan's inner battles – it was him that fuelled his addiction to antranide by dealing it to him. The destructive bender they went on together was still a total void of nothingness in his memories. He either couldn't remember or didn't want to. Maybe one of his other personalities was holding them for him.

Since he'd finally revealed his mental struggles to his friends and family, resulting in a loose diagnosis from Bulma, he'd been working hard with his saiyan half to build some bridges between them. It was certainly showing in his training lately, though he still hadn't transformed since he lost control the last time. And neither did he want to.

It had been almost two months since Cell went with Doctor Gero to find answers as to why his health was declining. Gohan had a hunch that it was to do with the fact that he'd been abusing antranide for years before he's got clean of it at the same time as Gohan did.

Dare he say it... he missed Cell so much, especially when he was alone. But he had to keep going. He engaged himself, finally rising to begin, and hopefully win, another day.

------------------------

July 22nd, Age 775.

Another day of training completed. Today Gohan spent most of his time with Vegeta, who was never easy on him, in fact today the saiyan prince wailed on him relentlessly. As much as he didn't have a natural flare for fighting in the past like his fellow saiyans, he had grown to enjoy his training as of late. It was a welcome distraction from the goings on within his brain; however, today was a particularly special day for him, one that he'd only shared with Trunks earlier that day.

Today marked 100 days since he last cut himself.

It was an immense achievement to say the least, and he had his training to thank for it. Six days per week for ten hours, training with people of all levels, including his father and Piccolo, which held some nostalgic value. Taking on Bulma's advice three months ago, he'd made significant progress with his saiyan half when it came to fighting. They'd made a deal – the saiyan would participate more in their training so long as Gohan promised to eat more.

Gohan had gotten so used to not eating in his depression over the years, that he was quite underweight for a while. He felt overly full and nauseous when he began forcing himself to eat again, but over time, he found himself craving it more and more, it gave him energy he hadn't known in years, prompting him to fight better, move faster and give him a clearer head in the field. He could anticipate his opponents' moves well in advance and found them easier to follow, he also picked up new techniques faster. He was in the best shape of his life, he'd regained his physique and maintained a healthy weight, his clothes didn't hang off him like they used to and fit him properly.

In his spare time, a few weeks prior, he picked up a book for the first time in over a year. Not to study, but for leisure. Bulma and Chi Chi noticed a calmness about him when he started reading again, he'd relax by huddling in a quiet corner somewhere and getting lost in a novel or two. Sometimes he'd help train Goten and Trunks as a way to distract himself as well.

On this momentous 100 day triumph, he left the training grounds and went into the house. It was 5pm. Dinner would be available soon and he was once again starving. But first...

Gohan still had a couple of secret guilty pleasures in the background, though nothing as bad as the habits he used to have. The first was using his shower time more often than not to satisfy certain... needs. He hadn't had sex in months, and his cursed hormones still weren't letting up, especially with all the testosterone in the air most of the day. The second was a habit he had picked up again recently, thanks to Jeice. His mother would certainly murder them both if she ever found out.

He kept checking over his shoulder as he scurried around to the other side of the building to make sure he was alone and got to a set of unused bedrooms. He entered the one at the very end, hurriedly removing his belt and kicking his shoes off. He went to a set of drawers under the window, fishing around the bottom one. He pulled out a cigarette and a lighter, putting the cigarette into his mouth and lighting it. He opened up the window slightly and leaned out of it, taking a long drag and blowing the smoke out of the window into the fresh air. There was a sound of relief as he exhaled slowly for a few long seconds.

"Filthy habit."

Shit!

"Ouch!" Gohan bumped his head hard on the window frame as he pulled himself back in, his heart in his throat. He turned around to see Cell sat upright on the bed in the corner of the room. He was stunned into silence, staring wide eyed at him. He was wondering how the fuck he didn't even clock that he was there. "When the hell did you get back here?" he asked, surprise in his voice. He rubbed the top of his head to stop a lump appearing.

"Is this a new vice?" asked the android curiously.

"Huh?" Gohan was still dumbstruck, he couldn't seem to form a rational thought at that moment. Cell gestured toward the cigarette in his hand. "Oh, not really. It just helps me relax sometimes." That was the truth. He wasn't exactly hooked on them and couldn't remember why he picked up the habit in the first place back when he was around 14. But it did help him unwind now and again. Jeice had managed to get hold of them from the Grand Kai of all people, in exchange for him and the other Ginyus helping him out.

"What are you doing in here?"

"Me? What are you doing here? I just come in here to smoke."

"This was my room the last time I checked, or did you forget?"

Yes, I fucking forgot. Gohan closed his eyes and shook his head in realisation. He thought it felt familiar, though he'd only been in here once with him when they first arrived there months ago. Did he subconsciously come back here as a comfort thing?

"Sorry, I can go if you want," he sighed.

"You don't have to," said Cell, his facial expression as cryptic as ever. Gohan sat himself on the window sill, his legs laid out in front of him so that he could blow out of the window easier.

"You never answered, when did you get back?"

"What if I told you I was here the whole time and you just never noticed?" he remarked dryly.

"I'd say you're full of crap," laughed Gohan lightly, taking another long drag.

"I got back this afternoon."

"And you're hiding in here because?"

"I'm not hiding, I'm just not in the mood for questions as all."

Gohan took that as a polite way of being told to shut the hell up, flexing his eyebrows. He continued gazing out of the window for a while, trying not to look at Cell at all. He felt a stirring in his chest that he hadn't had in a while but couldn't put a name to the feeling; elation? Dread? A bit of both?

And whilst Gohan did his best to avoid meeting Cell's gaze at all, he couldn't help but feel that he was being watched. Cell was observing him from a distance. That slumped position with an open shirt wasn't helping to keep his thoughts entirely pure. Dare he admit it but Gohan looked... good. Healthy, even. He'd clearly been taking care of himself, as well as training consistently. As amazing as his body looked, he wasn't sure whether he liked that Gohan had managed to crawl out of his pit of despair somewhat while he was gone.

"You look different," said Cell, breaking the tense silence.

"Yeah?" Gohan finally looked at him again, properly this time. Cell also looked a lot less emaciated. "You look better."

"Did you miss me, Gohan?" asked the android, a smile on his lips. Gohan paused for a moment.

"No."

"Don't lie to me. I always know when you're lying."

"Yes, I missed you," he admitted. He missed him so much sometimes that it caused him physical pain. He was almost at the end of his cigarette, a good excuse to get the hell out of there before he did or said something stupid.

"That's better," said Cell in that cool velvety voice which both irritated him and turned him on at times.

"I need a shower," stuttered Gohan, not meaning to give away his creeping anxiety. He stubbed out the cigarette, getting rid of the evidence. Throwing his legs around and hopping off the window sill, he attempted to make a break for it.

"Always in such a hurry."

"I thought you weren't in the mood for answering questions."

Cell repositioned himself, sitting on the edge of the bed and staring up at him. Gohan refused to meet his gaze – he knew that look.

"How much did you miss me?"

"I just... missed you. Can I go now?" Gohan shrugged his shoulders awkwardly.

"Did it hurt?"

Gohan sighed.

"Yes, it hurt. It fucking ached sometimes."

Gohan, what are you doing? Get out of here. Gohan willed himself to stop indulging him, to just leave and get on with his day as if he hadn't seen him at all. He felt a cold hand brushing against his own. Don't do it, Gohan...

He took it, Cell pulled him closer towards him until he was stood right in front of him, yet Gohan still couldn't bring himself to look down at him. Cell took advantage of that open shirt, his hand leaving Gohan's and tracing over his abs. Gohan physically flinched at his touch, not used to it. Those icy fingers were replaced by a warm tongue and cold lips, softly licking and nipping at his skin.

Gohan's hand suddenly ended up caressing the side of Cell's face without him even realising that he was doing it. He finally sneaked a look at him, the android catching his gaze briefly. Cell was internally basking in victory – Gohan's body was still responding to his touch instinctively after their last encounter. The saiyan wasn't even realising it.

Gohan felt the drawstring on his pants becoming looser, his kisses slowly moving even lower. His voice sounded in anticipation, though he didn't mean it to; his breath had a distinctive tremor to it. What are you doing, Gohan? Stop it. His hormones were giving his brain a good kicking. He was still moving lower, the next thing he felt was that warm tongue on the underside of his cock, which was already hard. Again, he failed to acknowledge how his body was responding, he was too busy trying to keep his guard up.

A sound escaped his mouth, it sounded so desperate that he was embarrassed by it. Then the android proceeded to swallow all of him down at once.

"Oh... okay... " he laughed nervously, his eyes open and wide for a moment before falling shut again.

Gohan got lost in it, the feeling of his mouth working on him, the sounds of it, even the look of it when he sneaked small glimpses down his body.

"Fuck... " This felt amazing, he didn't want it to ever stop. He had his hand on his head, he was bucking his hips subtly against his mouth, he could feel Cell's grip on his hip tightening. All he could do was moan and pant through it. He missed this so much, he missed feeling this close to someone. Most of all, he missed Cell's unyielding power over him.

And yet, the voice of reason continued to push through.

"No. Aah... no. Stop," he panted, withdrawing himself from Cell's more than inviting grip. He was pretty close to climaxing, but for some reason, he managed to find the strength to stop. His brain was frazzled and confused.

"Something wrong?" asked Cell coolly, catching his breath.

"You can't just disappear for months like that and then... " Gohan sighed frustratingly, fixing his pants. Cell chuckled at him.

"What can I say? You just taste so good. I could have listened to that all day."

Cell was teasing him. As much as his body was screaming at him to stay a little while longer, he was just too anxious at that moment.

"You're a fucking asshole," he scoffed, grabbing his belt and shoes. He left Cell laughing to himself.

He got around the corner and stopped, leaning against the wall to catch his breath. His eyes found the ceiling for a few seconds in an effort to ground himself. Then they fell downwards towards that unrelenting erection his pants.

"Shit..." he mumbled breathlessly. Lightly smacking the back of his head against the wall, he wondered just how much he'd hate himself after this particular shower. But needs must. ► Guilty Pleasures     Paranoia     Glasses     Shadow     Boyfriend     Hot Spot     Spark     Spark     Power     Real Love     The Party     Stripped     Embrace     One Moment     The Silent Treatment     Understanding     Amalgam     Instinct     Fortitude     Single